Someone once told me that women stopped going through puberty at 25. Great, I thought, from 25 it’s all plain sailing then. What I didn’t quite realise until I saw an article claiming your body starts to die at 25, is that that was what the first person had really meant. Not such a cause for celebration after all, then.
If there was a theme for millennials it would be talking about how old we are. I’m simultaneously delighted by the things I don’t have to do now I’m older and terrified by the speed at which months seem to pass. Where is September? How are we in the 20’s already? How am I in my mid-twenties? Disastrous.
Here’s the thing though, getting older is really excellent. Like, really actually wonderful. I love having more control over how I spend my time, I love having more confidence in my own opinions and my feelings and ‘I’m 25 I don’t have time for this/have to deal with this/just don’t care’ has such a great ring to it. 26 will sound even better, I’m sure.
These posts are cliche but here we are anyway, all the stuff I’ve learnt from my 25 years:
- I just cannot wear eyeliner. Yes I have tried that brand, no I will not sell a kidney to use that brand, I have hooded eyelids and some people's eyes are just not meant to be well-defined.
- Find your people. Stick with them. No matter how hard I try I cannot get everyone to like me (and God knows, I have tried). You will find your people - and not find them - in the strangest of places. Don’t question it, just get their number and hold onto them.
- You just have less time for people who will not find time for you. Mostly this is just because I have less time full stop. Friends who do have time for me will find an almost dictatorial schedule that they have to fit into.
- Jokes aside, I’m now almost certain that you’re not fooling anyone as well as you think. So you better just act like the person you want people to think you are. You are not a religion and you cannot ask people to have faith in things they cannot see.
- Be wary of people who only bring up anecdotes that make you look bad.
- I am only ever going to wear high-wasted jeans/skirts/trousers - me and my gangly legs are happy this way and no, I do not wish to appear in proportion.
- Laughing in the faces of people who have tried to insult you is the best of only bad options. Working in customer service taught me this, once someone has told you that you’ve ruined their Christmas, the only way to go is up.
- It’s not a myth, you really don’t give a shit anymore. I’ve heard you really stop caring in your thirties which doesn’t bode well because I’ve already been known to get up and leave a table to avoid unwanted interactions. There is a story to this but honestly it doesn’t get any better with context.
- With that in mind, forgiveness is not a bad quality, you do not have to be a bad-ass bitch who cuts people out at a moment’s notice. I’ve had so many wonderful relationships repaired this year and I’m so grateful I wasn’t hasty with my words when the problem emerged.
- That being said I could probably do with a little more haste when people have demonstrated they are not going to do any repairing.
- Trying, and I mean really trying, is not a weakness. You do not have to pretend you do not care about having people in your life, it will not help. You've just got to make sure you try with the right people, like, the people who actually show they care about you, not the people you wish would.
- As demonstrated, I cannot successfully wear pink as I will just become the human embodiment of pink.
- You do not have to be on a constant self-improvement drive, you do not have to clear out your life and start all over again. You’re probably completely fine as you are, and you are never going to be perfect so you pretty much just have to pick your flaws and own them at this stage.
- There really are no prizes for pretending you don’t enjoy things. I don’t know when it got so normal to be all ‘I wish I could not go to this event and stay home instead’ but please feel free to invite me to all of the things and I will definitely have an excellent time.
- Equally with other people, other people are the literal light of my life and I will not pretend any other.
- Going to the dentist/doctor/optician is annoying and inconvenient but you will get the sense of satisfaction of having your life together and taking care of yourself afterwards. So just make the appointment for the love of God.
- They say you get more conservative as you get older but I’m only get further from being any sort of #girlboss CEO with my near daily tweets about how our country needs a left-wing government.
*****
I am on Twitter - @clairegillesp - it’s literally just dentistry and socialism at the moment.
I am on Instagram - clairegillesp - where my profile says world-traveller but my saved collections says I just want a dachshund.
You can also look forward to more (!) Lebanon-based content on both of those platforms - which I’ll explain next week, maybe.
This week I've been watching The Expanse - it's about space and also politics so basically I love it.
xx
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